P4

Peer Script Feedback) 

This piece of feedback was good and i'll be using it to make my script better in some of my next lessons.
This piece of feedback was also useful advice-wise and I'll use the suggestions to improve my Script soon.

Planned changes to my script:It's been suggested that I add more character to Mark. I was originally going to leave his personality blank to have more chance for the readers/viewers to see themselves in it and to be changed as the story goes on. I've decided to have the story start with Mark at his lowest point in his life to add sympathy for my protagonist. 

Second Draft: 

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